Tuesday, December 29, 2009

arms, and lots of them

my lids are traditionally heavy at this time of day.

today i spent two hours with a beautiful young woman who is going to change the world someday; i have no doubt. she has that lovely, blue spark that i lost somewhere down the road, when i was busy searching for things like wrath and anger. i'm not trying to be morbid, or dark, or any of that. all in all, today has been wonderful. inspirational. all those words that sound cliché and terrible, but are altogether...true. thanks for spending time with me, thank you for your stories and laughter.

then there is you. i have heard about pain, read about pain, experienced it, sure. admittedly, i don't think i have experienced it to the extent that you have...nonetheless, i want you to know you're not alone. your world is not dark, it is full of people searching for love like you are, and if you let yourself be loved you will be fine. just fine. you may not believe in romanticism, you may not believe in me....maybe those two are connected—but either way, i know that there is a Love out there much greater than you could ever imagine. and if you let it, it will fill you until you are overflowing with strength and hope and beauty and...light. you are loved.

i haven't taken care of myself in a while, and i know that's dangerous and unhealthy and probably the cause of most of this week's frustration.........pardon me. i'm going to absorb the last few days of this break as a real break -- with relaxation and everything! so please allow me to balance my introversion with my love for you. thank you.

now...i need that nap.

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